Eliza Fletcher Running

Why We Should Never Forget Eliza Fletcher

This case polarized me from the morning of Friday, September 2nd when I first received the notification no my phone about a missing jogger. What happened to Eliza Fletcher is something that everyone has thought of being a possibility, something that all women and men need to be aware of, something that you really only read about, but never believed would actually happen.

In the early morning hours on Friday, September 2nd, Eliza Fletcher went on a run in her hometown of Memphis, Tennessee. She did this every morning, it was her routine. She didn’t know that this Friday morning would be different than all the other mornings. Eliza was met by evil in human form this Friday morning, his name should not get any notoriety so I won’t mention it, who violently attacked her after waiting for her to run by him and his car. These would be Eliza’s final moment. After her violent abduction, not long after, Eliza Fletcher was murdered and left at an abandoned help. Thanks to the Memphis Police Department, the University of Memphis, Good Samaritans and neighbors, the suspect was apprehended the next day. Eliza’s body was found on September 5th, and identified on September 6th.

This seemingly random, violent, stranger abduction raises so many questions, considering the suspect was previously arrested under violent kidnapping charges which he pleaded guilty too. This post is not for that or anything on criminal justice reform. This is for Eliza and why all runners, walkers, people who are outside, should remember her and this absolutely tragic event.

As runners and outdoor enthusiasts, we have all had nightmares of this situation.

Every morning, runners wake up to get their miles in, just like Eliza. They run for so many reasons – to escape thoughts, to stay in shape, to train for competition, but many see it as therapy. A simple act of self-care turned into a death sentence for this mother of 2 and now all runners will start their runs with a little extra awareness, a few more nerves, because of this tragic event. Even before the news of Eliza Fletcher’s violent kidnapping :

We play our music low or only wear one headphone so we can hear footsteps or people approaching around or behind us.

We carry pepper spray on our keychains for protection.

We were told to put our keys between our fingers and hold fists.

We share our locations at all times with our family and closest friends so they know where we are, when we are there, and if we are in the place we are supposed to be at.

We have disaster playbooks in our heads about how to handle people who cross our paths with bad intentions, so we have a plan if a terrible situation ever happens to us.

We make eye contact with some and avoid eye contact with others.

We make phone calls to trusted friends and family when we are alone and feel unsafe.

We touch trees, street light poles, walls, things on our path, so there is a physical trail of where we were and are headed.

As an active female, I have always been warned of the possibility of a terrible crime like what happened to Eliza. She could have been any of us. Whether it is in the morning, afternoon, or night, the fear of a random abduction has been warned. Yet, we all continue to do what we love – running, walking, hiking, etc. Eliza was outside running the morning she was senselessly murdered. The fear that we all have had did not stop Eliza.

Ways to Remember Eliza Fletcher

Share Her Story, Keep Her Name Alive.

The end of Eliza’s life is nightmare worthy, but it needs to be told. People need to know and change needs to be made. Women and men should not be afraid to go outside and ran by themselves. Share her story so others know that even though this appears to be a part of a horror movie script, it is indeed real life and was a real event that took place. We should not have to fear, but at the end of the day this is a very unfortunate reality that everyone should be aware of.

Keep Running for Eliza.

Continue pursuing your passions, your therapeutic activities, your marathon training, as she did regardless of the fears that she and many other women runners feel on a daily basis. Don’t stop running. Wake up every morning and run.

Stay Safe and Aware.

We should not have to worry about being abducted, but now more than ever we have to stay safe and aware. Do not let this story fade into the depths of the news and reporting and what’s the hot story – let Eliza’s story steer you into becoming an advocate for safety for women runners everywhere. Take the extra steps that may seem overboard – share your location, stay aware of your surroundings, carry a collapsable knife, carry pepper spray. I am sure that Eliza took precaution before her run, there is a reason why her case was solved so quickly.

Start a Community Watch Group

Keeping your community together and looking out for each other is important. Neighborhood Apps and Facebook Groups are create methods to stay in touch with your community. You never know what a small observation you make can have – many things that were reported by Good Samaritans and neighbors led to the arrest of Eliza’s killer and the discovery of Eliza’s body. If your community does not have one, start a watch group in Eliza’s honor.

Create or Join a Running Club or Group

The fear should not stop you from running or doing any activities solo – but in wake of Eliza Fletcher’s murder, it may not be the first thing on your to do list. Join a run club or create a run club to ensure that you are traveling with a group of people during your exercise. Whether it is a group of 3 or a group of 30, get people out and running and do so in Eliza FLetcher’s memory.

Eliza Fletcher Could Have Been Any of Us.

Eliza Fletcher’s case resonated a little extra to me and I know it struck a cord with many others. There’s been many times that I felt unsafe – the multiples times I called my father scared that a man was following me when I was walking home, or the car that followed me into my neighborhood when I walked home from school, or making eye-contact with someone who is uncomfortably watching me so that they know I see them and are aware of what is happening around me. The list goes on and it really is terrifying.

We cannot let this case slip beneath the rug and fade from our memories. Eliza Fletcher’s story must stay alive and everyone needs to understand the fear and the dangerous reality that we are battled every single day.

The fear is real.

The nightmare can be a reality.

We can’t let it stop us and dictate or lives. All we can do is prepare, stay vigilant, and plan for the worst. If we pretend the fear is not real then we are allowing ourselves to live in a false reality. Terrible things happen, we must acknowledge it, prepare for it, but try to not let it dictate the rest of our lives.

Rest in Peace Eliza Fletcher.


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8 Ways to Reduce Anxiety WOman experiencing anxiety and anxious emotions

8 Ways to Help Reduce Anxiety and Anxious Feelings

Believe it or not anxious feelings and anxiety are not something that is rare… In fact many people battle with anxiety every day. Anxiety can come at different levels and can cause a ray of emotions and physical effectives, it is very different for each person and each situation. Just because you don’t experience anxiety like someone else, does not mean that you are better or worse off. It just means that you process these emotions differently.

Regardless of how you experience anxiety, there are some ways to help reduce anxiety. Again, it is different for every person and this list serves as suggestions to try to help reduce anxiety and anxious feelings. These all may work for you, or none of the work – but navigating anxiety is a learning experience at its finest. Learning what works, what doesn’t, what helps, what doesn’t, what increases feelings, what decreases feelings, is all part of each individual’s journey and for everyone’s own discovery. So wherever you are, I hope this list can help provide some value and some help in reducing anxiety.


8 Ways to Reduce Anxiety

Begin a Meditation Practice

Meditation is a way to disconnect from what surrounds us and reconnect with our physical being. Removing distracts and disconnecting with what doesn’t serve you works wonders on an anxious mind. Practicing this disconnection can help aid in reducing anxiety because you become more aware our your physical being and in touch with why certain emotions are present. Your body reacting in certain ways, anxiety included, is your body’s way of communicating with you. When you disconnect to understand the underlying reasoning you can being to release some of the anxious tendencies.

Release Emotions Instead of Holding onto Them

Holding in past emotions, from all experiences, aid in anxious feelings. Whether we are aware of it or not of past experience shape us and until we acknowledge all emotions and the feelings/behaviors that are tied to them, we won’t be able to fully embrace life in the now. Anxiety plays a role as we are constantly nervous or scared to walk down roads or experience pain that we have felt before. Releasing these negative emotions to make room for positivity can help reduce anxiety and also makes rooms for more positive energy and experiences to fill the void that these negative emotions once filled.

Add a Morning Routine to Your Day

Starting your day with a plan, a routine, creates structure. For me personally, the unknown is a major driver of anxiety. Not know what is next or what to do is a trigger, especially when I have a lot of things on my plate. I worry that I can’t balance them all, and cue all the anxious feelings. Adding a morning routine provides a pattern of structure to follow, every morning the routine is the same and sets your day up on the right foot. This routine can incorporate daily tasks, self-love practice, hydration, physical activity, really anything that helps you focus on yourself and put yourself in the best headspace to start the day. Morning Routines do not prevent bad days, but they sure help create more good days!

Get Active

Physical Activity is known for producing serotonin. Positive energy and physical activity are was to reduce anxiety. Physical activity can be anything from a brisk walk to running a marathon. For some people it’s an hour long gym session and for other’s it’s a five minute walk during their lunch break at work. The point here is you do not need to compare your physical activity level to anyone else’s and any level physical activity and getting active can help reduce anxiety.

Daily Entries in Your Bullet Journal

Journalling is a practice that has helped more than just my anxiety, but has been vital in my own self-love & spiritual journey. Bullet Journalling is even more valuable because of the minimal time investment and lack of intense short. It’s brief, concise, and to the point. A three line entry will do the trick. Journalling is a great way to acknowledge and get in touch with your emotions, including anxiety. Acknowledging what causes your anxious emotions is the first step to addressing them. Once you are aware of your triggers, you can work to identify what has worked in reducing them and even what increases them – A bullet journal is a great place to document this information!

Make To-Do Lists for the Next Day

Those hard to fall asleep nights are usually cause by anxious feelings and can be tackled by simply getting thoughts to paper on the next day. Similar to a morning routine, writing out a to-do list for the next day before you go to bed is a great way to build structure. It can help reduce those anxious thoughts a fear of forgetting items or tasks that need to be done. I always feel that a written to-do list is more effective than writing one on your phone, but both are great options to help ease and calm your mind before sleep.

Use Affirmations

A great body builder, Kai Greene, once said “thoughts become things” and I couldn’t believe in this more. When dealing with anxious thoughts and anxiety, it’s important to remember that you are in control of your own thoughts, which in turn means you are in control of what becomes from your thoughts. That can be positive energy that is needed in all facets of live, motivation that’s needed to accomplish your goals, or even working on your physical appearance. Using positive affirmations that support abundance, success, self-love, and positivity, can help shape your thoughts and reduce anxious feelings.

Talk to Your Friends & Family

This ties to one that was mentioned before, but it is worth mentioning twice. Your friends and family all love you and support you, they are you pillars that are there to help. If you are experiencing negative emotions and anxiety, talk to them about it. Opening up about how you feel to a trusted source is therapeutic in its own right, and helps you put words to the emotions that you are feeling, which helps you address what they are, how they got there, and what you can do to help minimize their presence. It can also be a relatable conversation – People tend to hold in anxious thoughts because they feel alone, but at the end of the day every person often experiences some degree on anxious emotions. Talking to friends and family can make you feel that you are not in this fight alone, they can offer some great pieces of advice also!


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Underrated Self Care Activities

Underrated Self-Care Activities Anyone Can Do

When you think self-care, you may think a spa day filled with a 60 minute massage and champagne or a long gym session with lifting weights and cardio. Self Care is not as invasive as you think it is, even small tiny changes can start a ripple effect of positivity in your life. They key is to doing things for yourself, and for nobody else! Failing to practice self-care can lead to headaches, stomach pains, difficulty sleeping and even focusing at work. Self Care is vital to include in your daily routine, no matter how little it plays a big role in your overall physical and emotional well-being.

Self-Care is something that you have to choose to do, no one can make you love yourself. It’s not only a change in behavior, but a change in your mental health. When you prioritize yourself, amazing things can happen. Here is a list of some underrated self-care activities that anyone can do!


Revisit and Edit The Accounts Your Follow on Social Media

The content you ingest every single day directly affects how you feel. Sometimes we are not in control of how our friends, family, co-workers/bosses, and people we interact with engage with us, but you do control what shows up on your social media feeds. Remove people who no longer provide value to you, this can be ex-friends, celebrities, exes, anyone! You control what you are exposed to and who you follow on social media, make sure its what you want to be seeing.

Clean Your Space

There’s this new trend on TikTok showing “depression rooms,” which are wildly messy bedrooms and living spaces. I had one of these on high school, and even college. Just clothes everywhere and no will power to clean even though you so desperate want to have a clean space. It’s crazy how as you grow you learn about why certain behaviors were present in your life… Take 5-10 minutes a devote time to making your living space orderly. Being proud of where you exist is a vital piece to the puzzle, and is a great way to practice self-care. This could be totally re-organizing a room or simply just shifting around furniture.

Get Your Nails Done

The 20 minutes of sitting down, and getting a brief pampering make you feel like a queen.

Phone a Friend

Chat with a friend and catch up with someone you love. Even if you think it’s been way too long, having a conversation with someone you love can help you disconnect from what if holding you back and reconnect with things that excite you. Friends are also amazing shoulders to lean on in good and bad moments. You never know, you may call a friend to share some good news, but they need a good vent sessions. The self-care can work both ways!

Listen to a Motivational Podcast

The best thing about podcasts is that you can listen to them at any time. Throwing a motivational podcast on, or one that teaches you a new skill, while driving from work to home or going to/from errands can kill 2 birds with one stone. Even if it is only 5 or 10 minutes, you are still choosing to better yourself in that time! 5 to 10 minutes every day can add up to substantial time.

Reflect On Your Day in a Journal

Reflecting on your day – what you did, how you felt, who you engaged with, who you wish you had the chance to engage with, what’s left to be done, what it all makes you feel like now… These are all things that can help you prioritize your time in the future and can help you devote time in the places that would be best for your own mental health. It’s difficult to learn how to make lifestyle adjustments if we don’t take the time to sit down and reflect on our emotions.

Practice Mindful Breathing

Take a few breaths to reconnect with yourself and release what no longer serves you.

Get Outside

The power of nature and being outside is very underrated. Existing in the fresh air and taking in all the energy around you can help make a hectic stressful day into a light and enjoyable one. Taking time to walk around, or walk, or bike, or skate (see how many options there are?) is keeping you active and giving time back to yourself. Prioritizing yourself can be through activities or by just spending some alone time in different settings.


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5 Quick Ways to Live a Healthier Life Girl running up stairs outdoors in orange nike sneakers

5 Quick Ways to Live a Healthier Life

A few months ago, I was talking to my mom a lot about how, with a full-time job, a part-time job, friends, boyfriend, family, this blog, and many other responsibilities, it’s so hard to focus on living a healthy life. Time seems to just vanish into thin air and the time you want to use to workout is over before you could even start heading to the gym. My mom was feeling the same kind of stress around this as I was, and as everyone knows stress doesn’t do the body any good…

I tried to implement different ways to get up and move, eat healthier, and to get into a healthier mindset. Had some successes and some failures, but overall was able to shed some pounds and just overall feel better. Here are the 5 quick changes that have stuck in my routine and don’t take up too much of your precious time!


5 Quick Ways to Live a Healthier Life

Drink More Water

Dehydration kills more dreams than anything else. Staying hydrated is key to feeling healthy, from reducing headaches to healthier skin, water does the body wonders. Maybe it is just me, but I feel more focused when I am hydrated which helps while I work! Focus on drinking water at specific times in the day. I personally have a large water bottle and make myself drink every hour… With work and constantly calls with my team, it’s very easy to forget to just drink water. When I used to used glasses on water, I would finish the glass but not find the time to get up from my computer to refill it (I know that sounds pathetic but it’s true). Check out the water bottle I got – It’s been a total game changer for my water consumption.

Cut Down on Alcohol

This is obvious, but easier said than done. I never drank too much, in terms of having to have wine or beer every night with dinner or every time I go out. Cutting down on beers here and there have made a big difference in my appearance. I am less bloated and don’t deal with the dehydration and its side effects like headaches anymore. Not only has my body thanked me, but so has my wallet. The price of these craft beers and a good bottle of wine can do a number on your bills. If you have trouble turning down drinks, there’s some great non-alcohol alternatives out there. You can also order a soda water with lime, everyone will think it is a vodka soda!

Peloton App’s 10 Minute Abs

Peloton is my favorite thing in the world – I haven’t been able to ride my bike as much as I liked because of time, but also because my apartment doesn’t have central air. My Peloton is in the living area that has no AC, so there’s no way I would be doing a peloton ride in a sauna… I turned to the Peloton App and started doing the 10 minute ab workouts in the morning. These are short, tough workouts! I noticed a difference in my mid section just two weeks into Emma Lovewell’s Crush Your Core Class. They also have other great classes – like Yoga, Boot Camps, and Run/Walks. I also enjoy their meditations. The app has everything to help you live a healthier life, physically and mentally. The fact that the classes can range from 5 minutes to 60 minutes, means there’s no excuse to not try to fit in a short workout to your crazy schedule.

Work Day Movement Breaks

Knowing I am stuck sitting at my laptop all day, adding in movement breaks has been a game-changer. Every hour on the hour that I am working (and am not on a video call), I do 10 crunches and 10 squats. It takes maybe 90 seconds and gets the body moving. …Also after an 8 hour work day, you’re looking at 80 crunches and 80 squats, not bad for a quick addition to your day!

Sunset Bike Rides / Walks

Once the work day ends and I start blogging or working on side projects, I lose all motivation to leave my house. I am just mentally drained and physically exhausted from the day at this point. In order to get going, I set alarms on my phone for 30 minutes before sunset and make myself go outside and walk or ride my bike! The alarm really gets my up and moving. I always thank myself at the end of the day for getting out and about. It’s really a great way to end your day on a high note. I couldn’t recommend this any more!

A the end of the day, small little changes can make a big difference in your life. These 5 ideas are simple ways that I have found success is living a healthier life, but it doesn’t mean they will work for everyone. Everyone’s body and life is different. Let me know some things you have implemented to live a healthier life!


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Practice Self Love

5 Reasons To Practice Self-Love

You are your best friend

There’s one person who will always be in your corner no matter what, that’s yourself. Practicing self-love does not take hours, its a couple minutes or even seconds out of your day to give back to yourself. At the end of the day you’re the only one who truly has your own back. Don’t ever forget that!

You are capable of doing whatever you set your mind to

It’s incredible how the pieces just fall together when you look inward. Practicing self-love can help you accomplish all the goals you have, big or small. You truly are capable of doing whatever you set your mind too, and when you fully believe that you can, good things start to happen. Don’t let any negative talk cloud your vision.

You deserve the amount of love that you give to others

Don’t neglect to fill your own cup. You are worthy of all the love that you give others. Don’t settle for anything less than that!

The world deserves the best you

In this crazy world we live in, the only thing we can control is ourselves. Being our personal best self only brings positive vibes to the people around us. When you become your best self you’re capable of amazing things, you deserve that and so does the world!

You attract the energy you give off

If you think you’re going to trip and fall, chances are you’re going to trip and fall. If you’re sending out negative energy, more negativity is bound to come your way. If you’re sending out hopeful positive messages and energies, you’ll receive that back. Practicing self love is a great way to attract good things to your life.


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Insight Timer Meditations for Relaxation

My Favorite Meditations on Insight Timer

I am about two years into my meditation journey, and I really can’t imagine my life without it. There’s something incredibly soothing when you are able to take a few minutes to yourself and enjoy the calmness. In a world full of hustle and bustle and craziness, releasing stagnant energy and basking in the calmness around you really does wonders.

I’ve learned a lot about myself through my meditation practice. Allowing yourself to connect to the energy around you and disconnect from what no longer serves you allows you to move forward on whatever path you choose. Whether you are looking to connect to yourself on a deeper level or are on an intense spiritually journey, meditating is an incredible practice!

If you are new to meditating, I am excited for you! I hope that these inspiring you to settle your mind and search within. If you are a seasoned veteran, I hope these can provide some new guided meditations to keep in your back pocket.


First things first, I am not affiliated with Insight Timer in any capacity. I found Insight Timer when I first began meditating regularly and have used it since then for daily practice. If you are also on the app (or just downloaded it) let’s be friend! @teenafey (no shocker there).

These meditations are my tried and true favorites. Bookmark this page and come back to it time and time again to try out some new meditations on Insight Timer. Some are guided and others are music that plays a specific frequency. So settle down on your meditation pillow or yoga mat, sync up with your breathing and let your meditation practice begin!

Best Meditations on Insight Timer

Morning Ritual Jason McGrice

Cord Cutting Practice Avalon Starlight

Toxic Energy Cleanse Melody Litton

Healing Darkness For Sleep Jennifer Piercy

Open to Your Soulmate Jason McGrice

Cut Energetic Cords Renee Wilkinson

Love Energy Healing Session: Reiki For Sleep Ellen Mouton

Cleansing Cord Cutting Meditation & Visualization Jocelyn Valencia

Melting Stress, Fear & Anxiety Jason McGrice

Best Music on Insight Timer

417Hz Clears Away All Negative Energy Shrine of Enlightenment

Sacral Chakra Tibetan Singing Bowls Sonic Yogi

432Hz Heart Chakra Healing While You Sleep Healing Dawn

555Hz Positive Change, Deep Healing & Manifestation Simon Rose

Third Eye Chakra Singing Bowls Sonic Yogi

Deep Sleep Music – 1.5Hz Binaural Beats For Sleep Aaron Darrell

I hope you enjoy these Insight Timer meditations as much as I do!


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Healing Crystal for Self Love

Daily Practices That Promote Self Love

With the warm summer weather in full swing and good vibes all around, it seems like a pretty good time to add in some daily practices that promote self-love! Check out some super simple ways to add a little bit of self-love into your daily routine this summer, and beyond!


Meditation

Meditation is a great way to spend some time getting to know yourself. It’s also a great start or end, to your day. Giving yourself 10-15 minutes, or more, to decompress and remove yourself from the craziness that every day holds. Even if you fall asleep, you’re giving a few minutes thats meant for you and only. Nothing promotes self-love like a little me-time.

Apps like Insight Timer, totally free App and not sponsored in any way, is a great way to kick start your meditation journey. You can navigate through pre-determined sections like sleep, productivity at work, managing stress. It even have a fun tracker that shows you how long you’ve meditated for and consecutive days meditated.

Skincare Routine

Winding down your night, which starts pretty damn early in the winter, with a quick skincare routine is the perfect way to add in a little bit of self love. Whether its a a face mask, which you can grab for a couple bucks from your local CVS, or setting aside 10 minutes for some face rolling with your amazing rose quartz face roller, implementing a quick skincare routine can spark instant self love but also get your skin glowing!

Limiting Time on Social Media

Social Media has its pluses and minuses, especially when we’re talking about self-love. Posting a selfie if you want to post a selfie because you love your outfit is a great way to build some confidence. But social media’s down side is the constant comparison to others and unattainable beauty standards that are postered all over the applications. There is nothing real about social media anymore because all posts and content are insanely manufactured, even ones that don’t appear that way. Cutting time on social media gives back some time in the day to spend with yourself! Instead on comparing yourself to an Instagram Model, go take a self love meditation! I challenge you to check the screen time tracker on your phone to see how much time you spend on social media applications. How much time can you give back to yourself?

Cleaning Your Living Space

There is a very different feeling when you enter your house when it is messy vs. when it is clean. As a super OCD organized person at work, I sometimes let the messiness get carried away at home. Staying on top of your living space directly relates to how you feel. If you live in a cluttered space, your mind will be a cluttered space. Taking a few minutes every day to organize and clean you living space can do wonders for your mood. I’m not saying deep clean you entire home daily, put clean up after yourself, don’t let the laundry pile get crazy, and don’t forget to fold laundry after you do it. These tasks take such a small amount of time and you will thank yourself for it later!

Hot Girl Walks

Yup, hot girl walks are a thing and I am all about them. Especially with working from home, getting outside and breathing in some fresh air is a great way to give back to yourself! Getting outside a walking is not only great exercise but gives you alone time away from work or stress at home to just be with yourself. When I go on walks, I will call my friends who live out of state! It’s a great way to catch up with them and to stay involved in each others lives even though we live far apart. Hot Girl Walks can kill two birds with one stone – exercise and quality time with friends or family!

Picking Up a Creative Hobby

As work becomes more demanding in our lives and our focus goes towards making money to survive and pay bills, we constantly forget about what drives our creativity. Picking up a hobby is one thing, but giving ourselves a creative outlet is another! Whether it’s a blog, like this one, or painting, crocheting, writing poems, having a creative hobby can be an escape from everyday. It also lets us use different parts of our mind that we may not use so regularly. A creative hobby can bring joy! Try picking up a hobby that you enjoyed which you were young. I am a big coloring book fan myself, lord knows it’s the only artistic thing I can do.

Journaling

Journaling is a great outlet. Some days you can write a novel, others a few sentences. Writing how you feel, what you accomplished, what you did and more can be therapeutic. Your journal also acts as a place to look back on memories and see how far you have come. You can also get a laugh or two when reliving certain memories. There’s a lot of great blank journals out there, but also some guided journals with prompts. Both are great options, but at the end of the day if you begin journaling it’s important to pick a journal that speaks to you and motivates you to open it every day to write an entry.

Wherever you are on your journey to self-love, these daily practices can help carry you along!


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Reclaim Your Power Growth Mindset Post Break Up Self Love Self Motivation Growing pains Be Best

Reclaiming Your Power 101

Sometimes it takes getting knocked down to rock bottom to truly realize how often and freely you give your power away. When I say power, I don’t mean control, mentally or physically, I mean your peace and who you are.

Whether it is through relationships (both good and bad), work environments, expectations from family, anything really, we as humans can tend to lose ourselves and who we are by giving most, if not all, of our power to others (people, places, or things). If I’m confusing you with these winded explanations, let me break it down short and sweet :

Reclaiming your power is about loving and trusting in yourself.

Think about all the times you’ve allowed your thoughts, values, or goals to shift because of an outside influence. Or maybe even saw a future, with a person, or at a company, that was swiftly taken away from you. Those moments, when you feel lost, when your heart is in the bottom of your stomach, and you don’t know where to turn next, are when you need to reclaim you, your power, the most. Your path and life will change, that is inevitable. Staying true to who you are and even learning who you are, through tough times, when you feel powerless, is what reclaiming your power truly means.

Before getting into some ways to reclaim your power, it is important to acknowledge what you are feeling and why you are feeling it. Identifying why you feel lost and why you may be out of sorts can require some deep soul searching, but it is necessary. Was it getting let go at a job? A breakup? Fight with a friend? Understanding what is causing these low-level emotions is the first step. Next Step? Feel them.

Feel every single emotion. Name everything thing you are feeling. Sadness. Resentment. Disappointment. Regret. Relief. Anger. Then think about how you feel each of those. The knot in your stomach. The rock in your throat. That piercing pain above your eyebrow in your brain. The heaviness in your legs. Now tie those intense feelings to the words. That knot is your stomach tightens up when you are sad or missing someone. That intense headache is when you are disappointed in yourself. Whatever it is for you, identify it. and feel it. Feel the low-level emotions! Do not sweep these under the rug, because these feelings aren’t “bad” feelings, consider them signs. When you start to connect the “gut” feelings to the emotions or the situation, you’ll start to listen to your body when it is screaming “no” to you. You’ll start to get what your body has been trying to tell you all along. Once you are in tune with yourself, then you can start the internal work to reclaim your power. You got this.

Embrace Failure

Not everything is going to be perfect, and that is ok. Understanding, and I mean truly understanding, that not everything will be sunshine and rainbows is the key to embracing failure. In order to reclaim your power, its important to redefine “failure” as just a shift in direction from your ideal plan. Got that job you love and look forward to every day, but then there is a re-org and that position is no longer available? Not a failure. Just a shift. Maybe you’ll find an even better position with better pay. Just because one thing ends, doesn’t mean that life is over.

At the end of the day “failure” teaches us lessons. Teachable moments aren’t just for a classroom, they are for everyday life. Failing does not mean the end of the road, it means something new is on the horizon. Reclaiming your power can start when you start seeing a “failure” as a pivot to a new opportunity or new experience, there’s really no limits to where life will progress to.

Saying No

Say no – frequently and often, if necessary.

The power in saying no is extraordinary. Honestly, saying yes when you do not want to say yes to something can cause a slew of unhealthy chain reactions. The mental, and sometimes physical, stress of people-pleasing can be so incredibly heavy. Saying yes to everything, is quite literally, putting everybody before yourself. Remember, reclaiming your power is really putting yourself, your health and thoughts, first. Are there times when you have to say yes, 100%. I’m not encouraging you to say “No” whenever you are asked to do something, its always nice to go above and beyond for someone or step out of your comfort zone every once in a while, but more to set limitations and think about what you truly want to do and, more importantly, are capable of doing.

Do you want to go out to dinner with that guy you met last night at a bar? Not really, but he bought you a few drinks and it is at a really nice restaurant you’ve always wanted to try, so you might as well say yes and go. Nope. If you aren’t feeling something, say no, it could be a hard no or a “no, but.” Think about it : That dinner you said yes to, when you really wanted to say no, seems like a hassle because you really wanted to stay in tonight and lay low get some extra work done. You’ve been sleeping like crap and really wanted to get to bed early in hopes of feeling refreshed the next morning. Work has been super stressful since it is Q4, so you wanted to spend some extra time on the project you’ve been assigned while just relaxing with some much needed alone time. But you went to the dinner anyway, felt bad that he might think you aren’t interested if you said no, so you didn’t rest like you needed or get the work done. That dinner you said yes to, made you incredibly stressed out at work the next day because you had 3 client calls and no time to complete the tasks you wanted to be done with already but didn’t have the chance to finish because you had to get ready to go out last night. Not to mention the splitting headache thats a caused from the combination of a slight wine hangover and lack of sleep. You’re now staying at work late to get work done, but things keep piling on your plate. Your stress level just keeps rising because you don’t know when are how you’ll be able to catch up. Totally random, relatable, and super broad example, but see how one people-pleasing “yes” can turn into a landslide of events in multiple aspects of your life? It really is ok to say No. You’ve probably experienced much more severe instances than this one, but I’m sure you get it.

“Saying No” not only helps you reclaim your power, but it can help bring happiness, define your path, and provide you with clear vision on where you, and only you, want to see your life heading.

Stay Away From Toxic People Who Disrupt Your Peace

Say. It. Louder. For. The. People. In. The. Back.

This is going to be short sweet and to the point. Seeing the best in every person is very important, but what’s more important is identifying when someone is no good, or no longer good, for you and your life. If someone is sucking energy from you, it is ok to stay away from them. Sometimes you notice this right away, other times it stays hidden for sometime. It can be difficult, like extremely difficult, to cut ties with people, but in order to reclaim your power, you need to set boundaries with people and sometimes that means parting ways. Respect yourself, your energy, and most importantly your peace.

Quick Sidenote : You can be toxic for someone else, too. Internally think about what you are bringing to the table and begin to identify your own toxic behaviors. Self Improvement is always necessary. If someone leaves you, or something happens that you did not initiate, part of taking back your power, is acknowledging that maybe you were not meant to be in that situation. Maybe this plot twist you didn’t see coming is leading you to some of the best things in your life.

Be Alone

You do not have to always associate with something else. A person, place or thing. Not everyone has a place in your life. You do not have a place in everyone’s life. There will be times when you seem to be charting into unknown waters, alone. That’s okay. It can be scary, but again, that’s okay.

Reclaiming your power is not a giant happy party, going through this sucks. Like big time, sucks. In full transparency, learning who you are, what you are capable of, and getting over a painful event is not easy. Yes, this is a super light-hearted and fun blog post, but we need to call a spade a spade and it really is difficult. If you are embarking on this journey to reclaim your power, I commend you. I am excited for you and hope at the end you rise as the person you are meant to be.

Embrace the suck. Embrace being alone. Embrace finding yourself. Embrace trusting yourself. When no one is next to you to guide you or hold your hand, you are the only person who can lead. You and you alone, with your intuition and whatever spiritual wisdom you believe in, are it. This is when you really discover who you are, what you need, and what you want. You can also find out who is meant to be in your life and who isn’t, but that comes from really connecting with, understanding, and loving yourself.

Reclaim Your Power

At the end of the day, the point is to not let a situation or person take and maintain keeping your power. Your power is yours, don’t let it escape you. Letting a situation or person have power over you is what we want to avoid. That painful breakup may seem like the end, it’s not. That business you started going under, it’s not the end. The minute you start to maintain your power in whatever situation life throws at you, really shows how much you have healed.

If you are currently on the healing journey, and reclaiming your power, I am excited for you. Healing is truly an incredible thing and is something many people brush over lightly. To truly heal and reclaim your power is rewarding. As you continue on your healing journey, always remember to:

  1. Maintain The Standards That You Set
  2. Embrace Your True Authenticity
  3. Never Settle
  4. Truly and Entirely, Protect Your Energy
  5. Allow for Set Backs and Continued Growth

Good Luck. You Got This.


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It’s Okay To Have That “Sad Feeling.”

I’ve been told a few times that life isn’t always perfect. Ain’t that the truth. I can’t even begin to count the amount of times that things have gone wrong. Without being incredibly cliche, life really is a roller coaster. You could be on top of the world one day and with the blink of an eye, everything can seem to crumble to the ground around you.

It happens to everyone. Literally. Everyone has had that sad feeling at some point in their life. And guess what?

It’s okay to have that sad feeling.

That rock bottom, nothing can get better, sad feeling. That sad feeling that is totally earth-shattering and takes over every aspect of your life. It’s okay to have that. That feeling that makes you feel the most helpless and unconsolable. The non-stop stressing. The sleepless nights. The tears that just non-stop fall. The endless phone calls to the people that love you. That sad feeling that you wish was never a thing. It’s okay to have that.

It’s okay to have that sad feeling.

Because after a while, you start to realize that you aren’t as close to rock bottom as you may have originally thought. You aren’t going to let yourself stay in this ditch that you think you’re stuck in. That sad feeling shouldn’t of even been a thing. You’re better than that. But let’s be real, that initial moment can last for what feels like a lifetime. The sad feeling that makes seconds feel like hours, hours feel like days, and weeks feel like years. It’s okay to have that. Because you know what? It ends. That sad feeling does go away. It’ll come back, because that’s what it does. It tests you. It makes you question if you can get out of this rut. You can. You will eventually get to the point where you may just start thinking that this sad feeling can get better.

It’s okay to have that sad feeling.

That sad feeling that finally starts to go away for good, no more tests. It’s okay to have that. Things start to get better and you start to forget why that sad feeling was even a thing to begin with in the first place. That sad feeling that isn’t really a sad feeling at all any more. It is more than okay to have that because that sad feeling becomes a thing of the past. Those sleepless nights become a good night’s rest. Those tears stop falling. That helplessness goes away and you start feel in control again. That sad feeling that isn’t a thing anymore really turned things around.

It’s okay to have that sad feeling.

Because in the end, without that sad feeling the good feelings wouldn’t be as great as they are. Without that sad feeling you would be comfortable being content. That sad feeling forced you to be better. It forced you to grow. Without that sad feeling you’d still be in the same place you were. It may just be the push you need to become the person you’re meant to be. That sad feeling isn’t a sad feeling anymore. At the end of the day that sad feeling is the reason that things got better. You got better. That sad feeling doesn’t last forever. You can’t let it last forever.


May is Mental Health Awareness Month. It’s ok to feel sad. It’s ok to feel whatever you feel and it’s ok to go through whatever you are going through. It’s also more than okay to talk about it. Normalize talking about your mental health.

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4 Things I’m Grateful For From 2020

Back at it again with a personal post – Sometimes I think it’s helpful to share some personal stories with the hope that they can help someone else. So here’s mine! Looking back at 2020 as a whole, here are 4 things that I am grateful to 2020 for. All of these things are lessons and adventures that I hope will guide me through 2021. It’s all about living and learning, right?


Being Back On Long Island

This is a tough one to swallow at first, but at the end of the day being back home on Long Island has been a blessing. Leaving Boston was very emotional – it took a lot to leave the city. It was leaving everything I’ve known and knowing that my ultimate plans didn’t pan out how I anticipated them too. I felt like a failure. But at the end of the day, it was the exact opposite of failing. Moving back to Long Island was the best decision I could of made and has allowed for some great additions to my life. From a new job to new goals, and a new relationship – I think it’s safe to say that I am truly happy. I guess the Long Island life is for me.

Getting Out Of A Toxic Relationship

Navigating a toxic relationship is a situation I never want to be in again. Although it was short, the relationship took such a toll on my self-esteem, self-worth, and the direction I wanted my life to go in. You are the culmination of the 5 people who you spend the most time with – meaning the person you are in a relationship with is a direct representation of you. Being with a narcissistic person who is manipulative and emotionally abusive was something I didn’t want to admit. Acknowledging how I was being put down daily and noticing the negative habits, left removing myself from the situation as the only solution. So here’s my giant Thank You to 2020 for allowing me to see a bad situation and remove myself from it before it was too late. I hope anyone else in a toxic situation realizes it early and listen to your friends! Don’t be blinded!

Giving Me Back The Time To Work On The Blog

There’s always some silver lining to being stuck at home and not being able to do anything right? For me that was being able to dedicate a lot more time to this blog. I’ve always wanted to get this up and running – but between every thing I do and the consistent traveling to events, the downtime allowed me to focus my energy here! It’s been amazing and a lot of fun to work on growing the blog – I’ve learned so much and met some amazing people. The power of social media and the internet is really incredible. Seeing the follower numbers increase, the amazing comments, the messages, and the positive encouragement has been amazing and so much motivation to keep being consistent posting. So thank you to everyone reading this and for the on-going support – this has been an amazing outlet and and incredible learning experience for me. I’m excited for what’s to come! Get ready for some new content, helpful messages, and more fun tips for living the Long Island life!

Having Lacrosse Back In My Life

If you checked out the 10 things you might not know about me post, you’ll see how lacrosse has been in my life for pretty much it’s entirety. I’ve played team lacrosse since I was in second grade – it really has molded me to the person that I am today. While living in Boston, I shut lacrosse from my life and no longer coached, trained, or played the sport. Throughout 2019, I was able to get my foot back in the door to the lacrosse world. Last year (and early 2020), I was commuting back and forth from Boston to Long Island every weekend in order to coach. It took a toll on me personally and my friendships. Being back on Long Island full time has allowed me to not only coach two lacrosse teams but has allowed me to maintain a full schedule of private trainings. I’m excited to announce that I am going to be starting my own lacrosse brand which focuses on training and mentoring youth lacrosse players to help grow the game, all while giving back to areas where lacrosse is not present. I’m so excited for this new venture and journey. So thank you, 2020!


What are some things that you are thankful for 2020 for?


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